Change
In
a large family, space is a hot commodity.
Having a bunch of kids in an average house is challenging. I grew up as an only child. I had to share my space with dogs, dogs that
stole my Barbies because of some secret vendetta. Dogs that shared my bed and my mom’s
affection, I’m pretty sure she liked them more.
I still have dogs, but they sleep on their own pillows and are
companions, dearly loved, but not on the same plane as my children.
All
my kids have had to share rooms, even my only daughter until about the age of
twelve when she got her own room. This
of course meant that there were five boys in another room, and baby rooming
with mom and dad. Life was crowded. I didn’t mind. I grew up a lonely kid. I used to spend my spare time pouring over
the Spiegel Christmas catalog naming the kids pictured in the pajama ads around
the Christmas tree dreaming of a large family.
My
dreams came true – a positive change. Still,
it’s different if your family of origin is large. My kids are very territorial. I was pretty generous growing up. I could afford to be. There was no one threatening my space, vomiting
on my bed, or eating the last Pop-tart.
My kids claim their spot, and can be unpleasant to violators. Sometimes I just don’t understand. I have this Sound of Music vision, but an Animal
House reality. Change can be messy.
I
have half a family at this point in time, because several adult children have
moved out. Recently, we had The Great Room
Switch. Because of all the extra space
left from vacated young people, I thought we could rearrange things so more
kids had their own rooms – more positive change.
Surprisingly,
this change was not met with all the excitement and pleasure I had
anticipated. Sometimes folks are opposed
to change, any change. There was some
genuine sorrow over missed bunk mates, indignation over not having been
properly notified, and battles over favorite furniture. But it has ended well, and everyone seems
fairly settled.
Change
is not something that everybody likes.
It can make us uncomfortable and fearful. I miss my adult children. I liked it when they were all under the same
roof, crowded as it may have been. I
know it’s normal for kids to grow up and want independence. It’s good for them to spread their wings and
make their own decisions. I miss them
all the same. Some of them like
adventure and really have no problem with putting themselves in harm’s
way. Other ones are afraid of new
opportunities and don’t take the chances they should. Some are moody and discouraged and willing to
experiment with things that aren’t good for them. Some change too much, while others don’t
change enough.
Change is
fickle. It’s not predictable. Things don’t always turn out the way we
hoped. Sometimes we are left wondering
what the heck happened. But change can
be good too.
It may be hard for an egg
to turn into a bird: it would be a jolly sight harder for it to learn to fly while
remaining an egg. We are like eggs at present. And you cannot go on
indefinitely being just an ordinary, decent egg. We must be hatched or go bad.
~ C.S. Lewis
The kind of
change that results in a transformation of what we are, into what God wants us
to be, a born again change, is a holy change.
And
He died for all, so that they who live might no longer live for themselves, but
for Him who died and rose again on their behalf…Therefore if anyone is in
Christ, he is a new creature; the old things passed away; behold new things
have come. ~ 2 Corinthians 5:15, 17
Our
transformation can take us through some unexpected places. It’s comforting to know that through whatever
changes life has in store we are never out of our Father’s hands.
For I am convinced that neither death, nor life, nor angels, nor
principalities, nor things, present, nor thing to come, nor powers, nor height,
nor depth, nor any other created thing, will be able to separate us from the
love of God, which is in Christ Jesus our Lord. ~ Romans 8:38-39
I am glad
God doesn’t change.
Jesus Christ is the same yesterday and today and forever. ~
Hebrews 13:8
He is good.
Every good thing given and every perfect gift is from above,
coming down from the Father of lights, with whom there is no variation or
shifting shadow. ~ James 1:17
The baby bird
can’t stay in the egg. We don’t want it
to – we want it to fly free.
Therefore I urge you brethren, by the mercies of God, to present
your bodies a living and holy sacrifice, acceptable to God, which is your
spiritual service of worship. And do not
be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, so
that you may prove what the will of God is, that which is good and acceptable
and perfect. ~ Romans 12:1-2
Don’t be
afraid to change.
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